


feelings on fire, I'm a bad liar

by Anonymous



Category: NU'EST, Produce 101 (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Roommates/Housemates, Blind Date, Denial of Feelings, Fake/Pretend Relationship, M/M, Pining, Romantic Comedy, Tsunderes
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-07-08
Updated: 2017-07-08
Packaged: 2018-11-29 10:18:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,640
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11438799
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/
Summary: Jonghyun didn't sign up to be Minhyun's last-ditch effort at getting out of bad dates, but apparently it's a thing he's going to have to get used to, eventually.Now if only he could unlearn catching feelings.edit:discontinued until further notice





	feelings on fire, I'm a bad liar

"Are you busy on Friday night?"

Minhyun squeezes into the scant space on the sofa beside Jonghyun, nearly upending Jonghyun's laptop in the process. There's an empty beanbag across Jonghyun, large enough for Minhyun to sink into and waggle his limbs around without unintentionally maiming anyone else's body parts; Jonghyun half-expects him to do it, even, but if Minhyun thinks he's going to budge, then _tough_. He's not getting up from his perch unless he _really_ needs to go to the bathroom, and even then he still has an empty water bottle beside him, just saying.

It doesn't stop Minhyun from trying, and he digs his knuckles so deep into Jonghyun's side that Jonghyun can't help but grunt and scoot a few inches – the bare minimum, even – to make more space for him. It's not enough, though, their knees and elbows still knocking together and digging into each other's sides, but Jonghyun's already dreading giving Minhyun more excuses to come closer than he should.

"I have a report due on Thursday," says Jonghyun. He doesn't lift his eyes from his screen. "And then I have a client meeting in the morning."

"So you're free, then?"

"What part of that did I just say in a language you didn't understand?" Jonghyun huffs out. "Didn't I just tell you I'm busy with work?"

"You can take the afternoon off if you're going to be pulling an all-nighter."

"If I'm taking any time off, I plan on crawling to bed and sleeping until the weekend is over."

"As if you don't do that on a regular basis already." Minhyun reaches over to touch the nape of Jonghyun's neck, fingers resting at the base. He watches Jonghyun's Adam's apple shift and bob, the way he does when he's fidgety. Jonghyun's really, _really_ bad at acting. "I have a date on Friday."

"You always have a date on Friday," says Jonghyun. He shifts around in his seat, trying to get a more comfortable spot, but the pillows keep digging into his back, as discomfiting as Minhyun's hand on his neck, threatening. "I don't see why you keep telling me all about it."

"It's a blind date," says Minhyun. "I might need backup just in case."

"I'm seeing words come out of your mouth but my mind still can't process what it has to do with me."

"Do you really have to be this difficult every time?" Minhyun pulls his hand away, but the feel of it still burns, lingering. Jonghyun just scratches it away. "I swear to god, asking you for a favor is like pulling teeth."

"You owe me at least fifty favors," says Jonghyun. He points at the calendar by the wall, marked innocuously with all the dates Minhyun has gone on in the past year that Jonghyun's bailed him out on at some point in time. "Try again next time."

Minhyun lets out a loud sigh, his knuckles digging into Jonghyun's side. "Come on, _please_?" He wheedles. "I'll buy you dinner if it doesn't work out."

 _When_ it doesn't work out, Jonghyun points out, but that would just trigger unwanted flashbacks of Minhyun's past terribad (read: horrific) dates since his last attempt at a long-term relationship. Which. Wasn't really all that long ago. Jonghyun's suffered through enough weepy karaoke sessions and cringe-worthy marathons of primetime dramas to swear off blind dating – he's had enough secondhand experience living vicariously through Minhyun.

Privately, Jonghyun thinks that Minhyun really, _really_ should stop going on all those dates, if only to spare them both the aftermath. Not-so-privately, Jonghyun thinks Minhyun's kind of an optimistic idiot, that way. Maybe.

Now if only he weren't so weak for it himself.

"I want meat," says Jonghyun, eyes darting away from Minhyun's pleased grin. "The _really_ expensive kind."

"Of course," says Minhyun, earnestly, looking so much like a damn drama protagonist that Jonghyun wants to hurl or spend the rest of the night bathing in the blood of his pixelated enemies just to get the queasy feeling in his stomach to _stop_. "Anything you want."

"And we have to bring Hyunbin and everyone else with us," says Jonghyun. Because it's not a date. Really. It's not. "You're paying for my alcohol, by the way."

"And here I thought you were a cheap date," Minhyun groans, the illusion shattered. He's slouching, now, and looking so petulant Jonghyun doesn't know if he wants to kick him or just. Do. Something dangerous. "I mean, you _did_ take me to a hole in the wall on our first date."

"Our _only_ date," Jonghyun corrects him. "Until I realized you'd dig a greater hole in my pocket."

"I can't help it!" Minhyun's tone turns into a whine, long and drawn out. "That was really good chicken."

"You're so easy when it comes to food," says Jonghyun, shaking his head. "I don't see why you even bother with the pretense when you're only after a free meal."

"Eating alone is embarrassing," says Minhyun. "I like having company, and you never like going out to eat with me anyway."

 _That's because you make obscene noises every time we're together in public_ , Jonghyun doesn't say. He swallows the words, and says, instead, "I like eating with Minki more."

"Traitor," says Minhyun. "See if I ever make you breakfast in bed for your birthday ever again."

"I don't think that's much of a hardship when you keep burning the eggs," says Jonghyun, dryly.

"See, this is why we never made it past the first date," Minhyun jokes, and something settles in the pit of Jonghyun's stomach, gaping. "That, and your inability to clean up."

"Not my fault you're a neat freak," says Jonghyun, shrugging. Minhyun raises an eyebrow, and gestures at the near-overflowing trash can by Jonghyun's desk, and the layers of worn jackets and sweaters over the back of his chair and piled high under his feet like a mini-footstool. "It's called organized chaos!"

"Chaos sounds right," says Minhyun, dryly.

 _Not as chaotic as your love life_ , Jonghyun thinks, but he manages to bite it down at the last second. He's brutally honest, but not an idiot.

"If you keep insulting me like that, I have half a mind to just hibernate and blow you off."

"I'll put a tracker on you, just wait," says Minhyun. He lets his fingers rest on Jonghyun's elbow, a warning. "I'll text you the address. _Don't sleep in_."

"I never even officially said yes, though," says Jonghyun.

"You have absolutely no choice," says Minhyun. "If I wind up in the news if my date turns out to be a serial killer, I'm blaming everything on you."

"I'm your roommate, not your guardian."

"But who else would play my knight in shining armor if the date goes wrong?"

"Try Seonho. Or Hyunbin. _Literally anyone else_."

Minhyun pinches the skin at Jonghyun's arm, hard enough to make him wince. "They're still in uni. One look at them and my date will know I'm lying through my teeth, or a cradle robber." Minhyun pauses. "I don't know which one's worse."

"Whatever happened to you demanding I call you hyung when we first met?"

"That doesn't count. You looked like a lazy freshman back then, but at least you dress better now. Seonho still thinks basketball shorts are the only acceptable fashion choice in the world."

"I'm showing up there in yesterday's jeans and flipflops, just wait."

"You can show up naked and I literally wouldn't care as long as you get me out of there if it's _that_ bad," says Minhyun. He taps the underside of Jonghyun's neck, right where Jonghyun's pretty sure a flush is spreading. Naked. Ha ha HA. All the mental images are breaking Jonghyun's brain. Minhyun is seriously bad for his heart, and the asshole knows it.

"If everything goes well, though, you won't even have to come out of your cave," Minhyun continues, shrugging and giving him a shit-eating grin. "You might as well make use of those noise-cancelling headphones I got you."

 _Gross_ , Jonghyun thinks. _Gross, gross_ , gross.

"I hope your date throws water in your face when you make a stupid joke and that the food is as bad as your last attempt at baked goods," says Jonghyun, the closest thing to a confirmation and a blessing that Minhyun's going to get.

"Great," says Minhyun, cheerfully. "See you at eight."

 

 

"Okay," says Jaehwan, slowly, when Jonghyun rants about it to him much later on, "but did it ever occur to you that you could always just _not_ show up?" 

"I tried that once," says Jonghyun, despondently. The sounds of muffled cursing and gunshots being fired do little to lift his spirits, but at least he can talk _and_ game at a PC-bang without Minhyun hovering over his shoulder every damn time. "He didn't talk to me for a week." 

"Isn't that a bigger plus point?"

"He started talking to my mother," says Jonghyun. 

"Ah," says Jaehwan, with a soft sound of understanding.

The thing about Minhyun is that he tends to play dirty when he doesn't quite get his way. Call it pettiness, or being a tattle tale, or even survival instincts honed by having an older sister, _whatever_. The point is, he's always made it a point to butter up to the people closest to Jonghyun with his polished smile and practiced manners, just to make him suffer. 

And maybe trap Jonghyun into a lifetime of servitude and convenience, but that's neither here nor there. Jonghyun wouldn't put it past him, in any case. The asshole just really likes watching him squirm, for all of his supposed niceness.

"Yeah, I get it," says Jaehwan, when Jonghyun tells him this after a lull in-game. "He looks like he's a perfect gentleman but is actually a dirty old man underneath all those ugly sweaters and expensive skincare products. It's disgusting."

Just for that, Jonghyun shoots his character on sight. "Those are _my_ ugly sweaters."

Jaehwan rolls his eyes. "Right," says Jaehwan, "I forgot you practically use each other's clothes all the time even when Minhyun-hyung swears he hates sharing."

"It's perfectly normal to borrow clothes when you're roommates," says Jonghyun, shrugging off the pleasant shiver down his back. Getting his hopes up is an exercise in masochism and self-flagellation, but it's a temporary relief. Jaehwan, on the other hand, doesn't look too convinced.

"Technically, Minki-hyung's your roommate," says Jaehwan. "Minhyun-hyung lives in the room across you. If anyone should be raiding _your_ closet, it should be Minki-hyung."

As if Minki would be caught dead wearing Jonghyun's clothes. He might as well borrow Jihoon's, and it would at least be _eclectic_ instead of reeking lazy college student vibes.

"He hasn't learned that he doesn't need to go into everyone's room to clean up," says Jonghyun, sighing. "I think he's too traumatized from Dongho leaving a fruit cup on his desk and letting it grow mold for weeks before he realized it was there."

"You're all disgusting," says Jaehwan, cackling. "How do you even live?"

"I'm a busy man, cut me some slack," says Jonghyun.

"All those years in the army, wasted," says Jaehwan. Jonghyun kills him off again, and Jaehwan kicks at his leg. "I know it's a weird territorial thing for you, but just stop leaving all your clothes around, hyung. It's like you're a snake purposely stripping off your skin for him to find like a bloodhound."

"It's called laziness, not being territorial," says Jonghyun. "And stop making me sound like an exhibitionist!"

"If it were just laziness, I highly doubt your underwear would be in Minhyun-hyung's room, either."

"You're not supposed to know about that," says Jonghyun, narrowing his eyes at Jaehwan. "Who told you? Was it Minhyun? I'll kill him."

"And people call _me_ trigger-happy," Jaehwan mutters. He picks up a handful of potato chips and stuffs it into his mouth, scowling as he waits for the game to respawn his character. "Look, I know you think you guys aren't in an unhealthily codependent relationship, but you really are, hyung. I mean, who even agrees to pretend to be the fake boyfriend of a roommate you've been harboring a crush on for years? More importantly, who even agrees to be an ex's roommate immediately after calling it quits with them?"

"I don't have a crush on him," says Jonghyun, quickly. "And he was never my ex."

Jaehwan rolls his eyes. "Sorry, let me rephrase that: a roommate you're practically married to without the ring, the sex, and the tax benefits."

Technically, Minhyun gave him a plastic ring as a joke gift his last birthday, but Jaehwan doesn't need to know about that. The bastard hid it under mounds of cereal, and Jonghyun almost died choking on it in between all the milk and cornflakes. That's not love, that's attempted murder.

Then again, Jaehwan's a little bit unhinged, more than anyone expects from him at first glance, all unassuming. If anyone's even more full of bullshit than Minhyun, it's him.

"Unless..." Jaehwan points his mouse accusingly at Jonghyun, unreasonably excited. "Have you been sleeping with him? Is that why he keeps showing up to lunch in _your_ clothes with his shirt on backwards? _Have you_?"

Yup. Delusional, clearly. Someone throws a hand grenade at Jonghyun, but he's too distracted by Jaehwan to dodge it. He watches his character die a horrific, burning death, and stares at his screen listlessly.

"I liked you better when you were too scared of me to open your mouth," says Jonghyun. He thumbs through his phone, and purses his lips at Minhyun's _DATE NIGHT TOMORROW, DON'T FORGET OR I'LL CALL YOUR MOTHER_!!! He needs new and better friends, clearly.

"Dongho-hyung's the scary one. You're practically harmless," says Jaehwan, squinting at him. " _Especially_ when you look all soft after Minhyun-hyung says or does anything."

"He's _threatening_ me, if there's anything I feel about him it's worry over my life."

"Sounds just like you've been married for twenty years and counting," says Jaehwan.

"You're delusional."

"You're whipped."

"I wanted to play, not get my dignity crushed to pieces," says Jonghyun. He slouches in his seat, and tries to ignore the way his phone keeps vibrating with Minhyun's incoming messages. "Pick up your controller and prepare to get your ass kicked."

"Denial's not a great look on you, hyung," says Jaehwan, ever the most unassuming psychopath. "If it helps, though, we can always photoshop Minhyun-hyung's face all over our enemies and customize it into a mod. I bet you'd have the time of your life with that."

Just for that suggestion, Jonghyun kills him again, and again, and again, even if Jaehwan whines the entire time. And then he actually goes home and makes that mod, but it isn't as appeasing as he'd pictured it to be, gunning all the fake-Minhyun enemies down. If anything, it kind of makes him look at the sliver of light peeking out of Minhyun's door late at night, the sound of Minhyun's light snoring soothing his nerves more than the bloodbath on his screen.

Still, it's not enough, anxiety scratching under his skin as the clock pushes past midnight and into the first hour of the day of Minhyun's date. He logs onto Minhyun's SNS, gathering all the pictures of his past exes and dates like a creepy stalker and plugging them into the mod. It kind of helps a bit, but Jonghyun's not gonna think about why, exactly, it's so different this time around.

 _This is all your damn fault_ , he texts Jaehwan. His mouse hovers over the delete option, hesitating.

 _Welcome to delulu land, hyung_ , Jaehwan texts back.

Jaehwan's kind of right about that, but like Jonghyun's gonna give him the satisfaction of gloating. He closes his recycle bin and keeps the mod hidden in a folder, out of sight, out of mind.

(It doesn't really work.)

**Author's Note:**

> hi!!!! ty so much for reading this. it's been some time since broduce ended, and I've lost interest in between the time I posted this and now.
> 
> I don't know if I'll ever revisit this (nuest reunion? who knows?), but for now pls consider this as on hiatus. thank you, and happy new year!


End file.
